If Moms Wrote Fake News Headlines

What is “fake news” if not catchy headlines designed to inspire complacency from the masses? If mothers wrote propaganda for their offspring to read over breakfast each morning, what might they say?

If Moms Wrote “Fake News” Headlines

Christmas Presents Revoked for Sibling Cruelty

Boy Eats Vegetables, Wins American Ninja Warrior

Failure to Tidy Sends Two Tons of Toys to Trash

Local Pool Institutes State-of-the-Art Pee Detector

iPad Battery Glitch Strikes Devices Country-wide

Netflix Drops Caillou, Deleting All Existing Recordings of Classic Show

Researchers Conclude “Nothing Cool Happens After Your Bedtime”

Parents Leave Park Without Child After Multiple Warnings Unheeded

Mother’s Kiss Miraculously Heals Flesh Wound

YouTube Institutes Unprecedented Ban on Unboxing Videos

Park Rangers Urge Campers Not to Approach Mother Bears Before Coffee

Senate Approves “Because I Said So” Bill in Marathon Session

Studies Confirm Children Who Rise Early on Weekends Receive Fewer Treats

Hidden Camera Replay Confirms Angry Father Yelled “Funk!”

What would your headlines say?